mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
