Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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