i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Randomize