I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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