I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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