What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
