I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize