The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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