I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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