she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize