She is in my trunk
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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