Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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