i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
