We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
