piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
it's great music for shaving your balls
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Randomize
