I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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