don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
