"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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