I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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