Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
