i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
