Do vagina's smell?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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