Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
What happened to fro yo and sex?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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