READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
