And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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