And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
you inspire me to be a worse person
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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