this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
