nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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