sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
