I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
