32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
