You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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