She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Holy shit dude........stairs
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
