ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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