Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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