Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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