and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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