Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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