I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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