He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
