so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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