I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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