I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
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He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
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Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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