Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
