I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Randomize
