so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
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Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
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He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
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