Sponge bath it is.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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