Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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