I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
