I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
