my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
