lets start a swedish sibling band together
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
